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Chris: What do Biff and I have in common? We both learn from our experiences, colored by our perceptions, influenced by our, um, oddness. But I gotta give Biff credit, he has a lot more of those weirdly memorable experiences than I.
well, i had to pull weeds on summer. there was a ‘weed’ that was about 4 inches tall in the garden that had just been moved over every now and then for the last 5-6 years. that ‘weed’ turned out to be an oak tree that had been moved over so many times that the roots were 6-7′ long. true story.
and yes, i dug/pulled the whole thing out. it was a trophy for a while… a very short while, but a while none the less.
Oh geez, one time there was one of those little shrubs growing by our stream, right? Weeelllll we didn’t really think about it…. next thing we know it’s TEN FEET TALL and I had to cut it down with my sword. My hands did not appreciate this. >_
heh. our yard gets like that when the tractor is broken (which is all the time)… well, maybe not _that_ bad. but untill the lawn was mowed yesterday, the grass was aproaching shoulder hright, in places…
I actually do have weeds like that. They seem to like to grow right next to the house. My mom sometimes tells me to go mow the walnut trees. They sprout up too often.
Also, have you ever had to pull a giant weed as tall as you are, with bristly, throny crap covering every square centimeter of it’s being? Not a pleasant experience.
That actually happened to me. I thought it was a small tree, and my mom informed me that it was a weed and my job to get rid of it with the only tool we had….
I basically live in a forest-like-place, and in our back yard we have trees like that. They’re so freaking tall it’s maddening.
It’s almost scary to think that they’re actually weeds…
Changeling, if the grass was shoulder high you should have just baled it. My dad intentionally lets our yard grow high in the spring and we get two to four round bales out of it depending on the weather. The cows appreciate it.
Lunatika, A sharp machete, yes, but a machete is the most effective sword-like thing for hacking.
I agree with the Scarf, but in my experience marlin is by far the best fish to chop down a tree with.
Now tell me: how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
November 18th, 2006 at 9:39 am
Off and on I’ve jumped around your collection here. Nothing specific to say, except: I like it. (Maybe because Biff and I have so much in common.)
November 18th, 2006 at 11:55 am
He needs bigger scissors.
November 18th, 2006 at 12:49 pm
Andre – what do you have in common with Biff?
Greender – I think he needs a chainsaw.
November 18th, 2006 at 12:54 pm
I share his puzzlement and confusion with a world that seems to be inconsistent and irrational. ‘Cept it’s mostly *my* fault that nothing makes sense.
November 18th, 2006 at 12:59 pm
I sure he would appreciate your sympathy.
November 18th, 2006 at 11:10 pm
Chris: What do Biff and I have in common? We both learn from our experiences, colored by our perceptions, influenced by our, um, oddness. But I gotta give Biff credit, he has a lot more of those weirdly memorable experiences than I.
January 4th, 2007 at 1:12 pm
I’ve actually seen a yard get that bad….
*shudders at the memory of having to clear it out* God I hated that summer!
January 5th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
“Quick! GO GET THE SHOTGUN!!!” hehe, I don’t really have a yard of mine own
January 12th, 2007 at 6:21 pm
? why not just leave it there and pretend its a tree?
January 13th, 2007 at 10:49 pm
(yawns) I can procrastinate better than he can.
February 3rd, 2007 at 12:08 pm
He could build a tree house. Or, say he’s gonna build a tree house in a few minutes, after all the good shows are over.
February 18th, 2007 at 12:06 pm
I thought it was for his hair at first, but then i realized that his hair is probably the source of his invulnerablility
April 6th, 2007 at 7:44 pm
He must of left the yardword for quite some time for the weeds to evolve bark to produce on their sides. Unless of course its a tree…
April 10th, 2007 at 5:20 pm
well, i had to pull weeds on summer. there was a ‘weed’ that was about 4 inches tall in the garden that had just been moved over every now and then for the last 5-6 years. that ‘weed’ turned out to be an oak tree that had been moved over so many times that the roots were 6-7′ long. true story.
and yes, i dug/pulled the whole thing out. it was a trophy for a while… a very short while, but a while none the less.
April 10th, 2007 at 6:17 pm
Colin, what hair?
April 17th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
I had that happen once. We had a weed about seven feet tall on the side of our house… Yeah
April 22nd, 2007 at 5:38 pm
That’s gotta be one HELL of a dandelion.
April 23rd, 2007 at 8:13 am
I can just hear biff thinking, “where do i start first?”
April 27th, 2007 at 7:59 am
“That’s going to be me one day.”
May 24th, 2007 at 8:12 pm
Oh geez, one time there was one of those little shrubs growing by our stream, right? Weeelllll we didn’t really think about it…. next thing we know it’s TEN FEET TALL and I had to cut it down with my sword. My hands did not appreciate this. >_
June 5th, 2007 at 1:59 am
Awww, I want a sword.
My goal is for my house to become a tree, it sits there for so long.
June 19th, 2007 at 8:20 pm
He’ll probably try and whittle it to a stump with those tiny things.
June 26th, 2007 at 9:57 am
heh. our yard gets like that when the tractor is broken (which is all the time)… well, maybe not _that_ bad. but untill the lawn was mowed yesterday, the grass was aproaching shoulder hright, in places…
July 1st, 2007 at 5:08 am
Swords are the wrong tool to cut down trees!!!!!!!!
If you have to use something swordlike, use a machete.
July 13th, 2007 at 7:43 pm
He should get the tree to sit in his recliner. That would chop it!
July 15th, 2007 at 9:19 pm
I actually do have weeds like that. They seem to like to grow right next to the house. My mom sometimes tells me to go mow the walnut trees. They sprout up too often.
August 8th, 2007 at 4:02 pm
@Mint: SWORDS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY.
August 8th, 2007 at 4:03 pm
Also, have you ever had to pull a giant weed as tall as you are, with bristly, throny crap covering every square centimeter of it’s being? Not a pleasant experience.
August 17th, 2007 at 11:09 pm
That actually happened to me. I thought it was a small tree, and my mom informed me that it was a weed and my job to get rid of it with the only tool we had….
kitchen sheers.
September 2nd, 2007 at 7:43 am
This one’s actually happened to me, too. Ever seen a three inch thick poison ivy vine?
October 11th, 2007 at 3:59 pm
I basically live in a forest-like-place, and in our back yard we have trees like that. They’re so freaking tall it’s maddening.
It’s almost scary to think that they’re actually weeds…
October 16th, 2007 at 8:14 pm
Chainsword
October 30th, 2007 at 8:56 pm
Besides, everyone knows that the proper tool for tree cutting is Carp.
November 13th, 2007 at 9:25 pm
PaChah! Herring works better.
February 5th, 2008 at 10:02 am
Changeling, if the grass was shoulder high you should have just baled it. My dad intentionally lets our yard grow high in the spring and we get two to four round bales out of it depending on the weather. The cows appreciate it.
February 13th, 2008 at 2:56 am
I love how disgruntled he looks here.
May 29th, 2008 at 8:17 am
Knife knut, A very sharp machete
June 4th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Lunatika, A sharp machete, yes, but a machete is the most effective sword-like thing for hacking.
I agree with the Scarf, but in my experience marlin is by far the best fish to chop down a tree with.
Now tell me: how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
September 29th, 2008 at 3:20 am
lmao, looks like my next door neighbor, lol
October 16th, 2008 at 6:59 pm
im supised hed not useing his flaming hammer
January 13th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
Here in Colorado, we call those trees. Weeds are the ones that don’t get that big.
June 3rd, 2009 at 12:59 pm
A) Say they are trees and leave them be
B) get a chainsaw and get rid of them
A would be safer, but since we’re talking about Biff…
February 26th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Woof (bad pun of the day)
July 13th, 2010 at 6:22 pm
Technically, a weed is any plant that is in a place where it is not supposed to be.
July 28th, 2010 at 3:12 pm
*sigh* This has happended to me