#359 - Link
October 19th, 2007

#359 - Link

I got picked for jury duty a few months ago. I had to call in the night before and listen to a recording to see if my juror number was chosen. At the end of the recording it was explained that you can not bring cell phones with cameras into the building so please leave them at home or in your car. The next day I drove to the court house and parked in the parking garage. When I got to the elevator there was a sign above the button explaining that camera phones are not allowed in the building. There was also a recording playing from a speaker right above me letting me know that camera phones are not allowed in the building. As I approached the front entrance I noticed that there were signs taped to the inside of all 10 glass doors and each wing of the revolving door. When I got close enough to read them I found out that camera phones are not allowed in the building. When I got into the lobby there was a sign with a big arrow on it showing me where to line up to go through the security check and it also informed me that camera phones are not allowed in the building. I got in the back of a line of about 15 people. After a few minutes I made it about halfway down the hallway and came to a stop next to a 3 foot tall sign that let everyone know that camera phones are not allowed in the building. As I got closer to the front I could now see the other people going through the security check. I watched a woman put her bag on the conveyor belt and then step through the metal detector that had a sign on it letting her know that camera phones are not allowed in the building. When she went to get her belongings on the other side of the x-ray machine she seemed to get into an argument with the security personnel. After a few minutes she stormed back down the hallway towards us yelling loudly “Camera phones are not allowed in the building! If you have one with you, just go back to your car right now because they sure won’t let you in!!”

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^ 51 Comments...

  1. Drak

    Enough warnings about camera phones?

  2. Hiei Umbra

    It seems to me that the woman in question was either blind or just stupid…

  3. MoosePhysh

    I vote for the second. Unless she were DEAF and blind.

  4. Micah

    God, that’s gotta chafe. How EXACTLY can one forget that he’s wearing that? Low threshold of pain? (That WOULD explain quite a lot.)

  5. Foxfire

    Well…he DID go get a ball out of a razor bush and was rather…unfazed by it.

    As for the comment, stupid people are the best aren’t they? I predict a Darwin Award in that um….poor?…lady’s future.

  6. Mike

    This has to be my favorite story to go with the comic so far.

  7. PsychoDuck

    Yeah, moron lady enough? No camera phones! No camera phones! No camera phones!

    “What, I can’t take my camera phone in? AND WHY NOT?!?!?” *Sigh*

    Also, chain mail underwear is great if you plan on jumping over any barbed wire fences.

    The Duck Has Spoken.

  8. Rainewolf

    wow…chainmail underwear…I never thought I’d hear of that outside renaissance faires…

  9. MoistSnailPoop

    I hope the metal detector isn’t at the entrance of a heavy duty magnet factory.

  10. Seraphine

    So will strip down for security?

  11. Chris

    Wow, thats pretty dumb, although easy enough to do when your mind is else where.

    I used to work in Theatre, and you know you have that guy that reads out across the PA “Please ensure your cell phone are turned off during this performance”….This was the guy who was operating the sound where I worked, he was a Cambridge grad, so a pretty smart guy.

    Anywho, 20 minutes into the performance, his cell goes off, and somehow manages to reset the entire sound desk with it. One loud, professionally amplified through a few hundred amps, crackle and a loud pop later….
    As far as I know, he is still being ridiculed for it.

  12. pieman

    @MoistSnailPoop:

    i hope it is.

  13. The Crack Ninja

    I know how you feel Chris, I somehow always get stuck very close to those kinds of people. It’s like they don’t even notice the world around them, or that they think the rules don’t apply to them. I’m actually thinking about becoming a security guard or policeman just so that I can piss those kinds of people off by enforcing the rules.

  14. Garrett

    She doesn’t sound suitable for jury duty, considering you have to actually notice stuff in that job.
    As for forgetting you’re wearing chain mail underwear, well, it’s easy to overlook things if you’ve been wearing them for a long time. People point out my shirts sometimes, and I always have to look at my shirt to know which shirt they’re talking about. Now where’d I put my glasses…. *finds them on top of my head*

  15. Tinned Moron

    Camera phones are not allowed in the building.

    If you bring one anyway, we will eat it.

    No exceptions.

  16. Mosh

    Camera phone owners are like smokers and those people who take flash photographs in the darkened rooms in zoos and bird parks - the rules don’t apply to them. Signs and warnings are just for other people.

    I liked the sign I saw at a zoo in New Zealand:

    “Do not feed the crocodiles. Anyone found to be throwing anything into the crocodile area will be asked to -

    a) retrieve it

    b) leave the zoo”

  17. Nick Steele

    There was a time, once when i’d set off the detectors outside shops for no reason, more often that not when i was going into the shop. I set off the detectoor at the library when i was carrying no books, i set off the metal detector at the airport when i’d epmtied my pockets of all my keys, cash, etc, i’d even taken my glasses off, and they still confiscated my boots for 15 mins so they could carefully unlace them, look around and generally waste my time. It took at least 15 mins to put the laces back, too…

  18. Bullet Fiend

    In response to blog-ish comment: I know, it’s sad and unfortunate, but people like this exist…all over the place…!

  19. Anton T

    Pretty amazing what people do though.Like Nick,for some odd 3 years i would set off any and all mall alarms.It was all very confusing but for the last few years it just stopped.Even though i still have all the same items on me…puzzling

    I remember beeing stopped in the airport when my belt went off,the guards just would believe me that it was my belt until i actually asked them to scan it

  20. Gobbledegook

    I made a chainmail bra for my wife a couple years back… she wore it once with a Halloween costume and never wore it again.
    I think now I’ll make Boxer shorts next.

    I guarantee any lawyer seeing that moron would be chomping at the bit to put her on a panel… My cousin (a lawyer from Harvard law) told me that lawyers are specifically told to try and put unintelligent people on a panel if they’re defending; dumb people are usually more easily manipulated and confused by shady logic games and semantics. Pure gold for any lawyer who only needs a hung jury.

  21. MaskedMan

    Hah! I bet SABIC wanted a dumber jury than we gave them… 12 well-educated people (mostly professionals) on the jury… Cost them over 400 million dollars.

    Not a single camera phone amongst us.

  22. joequincy

    Classy.

    Almost beats the time I walked through the metal detector fully three times (took off belt after the first, removed wallet after the second, still got beeped on the third) an was told to go sit aside so that they could do a “full-scan”……..

    Turns out I had an Altoids tin in my pocket. I’m glad they accepted that, because they were about to get a whole lot closer to me… : []

  23. Kevin Sleet

    Chain mail?
    To avoid some discomfort wouldn’t he have to…
    uhh….ugh! Shave?

  24. EmeraldeJade

    I had Jury Duty too a few months back and you know what I noticed? Though you can;t bring your camera-phone, ipod, or any other listening device in, you were allowed to bring in a laptop. Now what kind of sense does that make? Also, do we even want to know where Biff got Chain Mail underwear?

  25. Sean

    I don’t know if I’m being contrarian or playing devil’s advocate, or some combination of the two, but does any major cell phone company even sell a phone without a camera built in to it today?

  26. Imaginary

    Biff wears chainmail underwear? >> ….. Boxers, briefs, or bikini briefs?

    And Micah: I think you mean high threshhold for pain, threshhold being what you can stand, like I have an intolerably low threshhold for ignorance and spicy foods….

    Just to be clear, that lady announced that for all the other rule ignorant people like her, that if she could be sent away so could they… But, the award for wasting everyone’s time and annoying the smart people goes to…

  27. GK

    If you think people who don’t pay attention in court rooms are bad, try driving when they surround you.

    Also, I find it interesting that the blog entry is the same length, if not longer, the comic.

    And third, those kind of people make me sad for the world. :(

  28. Hanii Puppy

    “Also, I find it interesting that the blog entry is the same length, if not longer, the comic.”

    The blog entry is always longer than the comic o.o the comic is one sentence (not always even that), the blog entry is a whole paragraph o.o

  29. dragonbrad

    well today i made the best chicken sallad. it was chicken and relish and mayo, and hears the catch, i put it in the blender and set it on pourea, and drank a little to find out that it was like chowder. the rason why i put it in the blender is so i could make chikin salad faster. may a moody baby doom a yam

  30. Heroofhyla

    My dad has to be careful in metal detectors because he has a staple in his brain from when they had to close an anyeurism. Also, he can’t get MRIs.

  31. A Captain

    Wow, mob mentality or what? Poor lady was probably distracted that morning or something. Without knowing just how in-your-face the signs were, I can’t say for certain how dumb she actually was. Her overreaction doesn’t seem justified, though, so it really goes both ways.

    As a guy who works in retail, I get a lot of dumb questions that get repeated over and over and over, but to the customer it’s always the first time it’s been asked. Everyone’s been in a similar situation, I’m sure. If you HAVEN’T, well, you’re perfect and are probably also mature enough not to badmouth someone for having a blonde day.

    Relax, y’all. :)

    And as for the comic: Man, what a social faux pas. That’s like going through your entire workout at the gym with your fly down (that being my latest dumb adventure).

  32. GK

    Hanii Puppy, I meant the paragraph could fill up a panel

  33. Colin

    lol, bill engvald once said…
    Here’s your sign.

    O_o The chafing…THA CHAFING!!!O,O

  34. Colin

    i also think GK was referring to the actual size of the comic. as in height and width

  35. Alex

    Perhaps his chain mail is a chastity belt? Maybe, he thought the airplane guards who interrogated him would be “rough?”

    At any rate, I am perfectly confident that woman saw all the signs. I think she just expected them to be lax on the rules. But, I get my camera phone, because I am me, the rules don’t apply. That was why she was angry when she failed to get her way.

  36. Black Mage

    Seriously… how does one go about not noticing that despite the excessively pointless warnings?

  37. KuKu

    i wonder what kind of bonus you can get in D&D for chain-mail underwear. Would it be the same as the rest of the armor, it would be interesting

  38. Mal

    Wow, the commentary is bigger than the comic is. O:

  39. Lord Klingsor

    This sounds like a bad idea for more than one reasons.

  40. Maniac

    Save your spawns… Wear chainmail underwear! Save your spawns, Costs only $20.00!

  41. MaskedMan

    Considering how much damage Biff takes on a regular basis, chainmail boxers are probably no more than reasonable precaution… 0.o

    I once got an eyeful of a rather shapely lass in a chainmail bikini… First reaction was *Yummy!* Second reaction was *wince.* I bet she had marks in places she didn’t want marks when she was done wearing that suit.

  42. MarcusDranz

    Well, at least it’s not a chainmail THONG.

  43. BluWaterDragon

    @KuKu: There’s no Bonus for wearing a Chain Bikini in D&D (I play it, sad fool that I am,) However turn up to a Rennassaince(sp?) Faire wearing one and you are likey to have one of several things happen:

    a) If you are a ‘fit chick’ you will be drooled over, by sweaty people in armour.
    b) If you are a not so ‘fit chick’ (like me, although in my defense I have never worn skimpy armour, and I don’t ever intend to!!) then you will probably be laughed at.
    c) If you are a guy of ANY type, you will be ignored untill you go away. Men in Chainmail Thongs are what gives LARPERs a bad/even worse name, to normal people.

    I feel a bit sick at the thought of that actually.

  44. LightBlade005

    Why weren’t cam phones allowed?

  45. Mr. Son

    Augh, I remember going through a metal detector once when I went to get my name changed. I set it off and they scanned me with the wand… Oops. I’d forgotten about the bracelet that I never took off (even to shower). It was a one-piece that was a pain in the hand to remove, and getting harder as I grew (I was a teen, then). When I got home that evening I wrestled it off and stopped wearing it completely, to avoid another embarrassing scene like that from occurring somewhere more touchy - like airport security.

    Thank goodness for understanding and patient Security!

  46. Chivalrybean

    Gah! I went to Jury Duty with my super nifty pocket knife that fit in my wallet… so nifty and small that naturally I forgit I had it with me. Because of where I parked and when I got there I didn’t have time to take it back to my car. So, they said they couldn’t hold onto it for me, they had to destroy it. So, reluctantly, I gave it over, went and watched a boring video about how awesome it is to serve your country (not saying it isn’t, but the video was lame), and then found out that the case was cancelled or whatever and I didn’t need to be there anymore.

    The only solace I have is that it was a christmas party white elephant gift, and that I hope the security schmo who I’m sure ‘destroyed’ it is enjoying my knife.

    I did get like, 13 bucks for showing up though.

  47. Radical Edward

    This is why I don’t make metal lingerie.

    However, my father did jury duty and since he was at Microsoft, he ended up doing the “We, the jury, find the defendant guilty\not guilty” spiel that follows.

  48. Elkian

    A friend of mine (NAME UNDISCLOSED) learned the hard way not to combine underwire bras, airports, and big-mouthed security guards.

  49. Jim

    And yet, they allow laptops which are FAR more functional than phones. When I was on jury duty, I laughed my ass off at that one.

  50. yeremy yao

    man, i have that chain mail problem all the time.

  51. Samson

    Erm…as a maker of chainmaille, I can assure you, with the right rings, chaffing is not an issue. As for the style, my aluminum chainmaille thong is really quite comfortable. I made it when I decided that boxers and briefs would be a little hard to tailor, and it’s a great conversation piece, it really is.

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