April 4th, 2008
#479 - Great
I love cheese but cheese graters are scary. When I was in college and didn’t have a dish washer I would dread having to wash them by hand. So many cutting surfaces to accidentally cut yourself on. When I worked at restaurants they always had a big electric cheese shredder. Those things could really do some damage if you weren’t careful.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:02 am
I like the cheese graters at Italian restaurants, the kind with the crank that the waiter brings right to your table. I always get a huge pile of cheese on whatever I’m having.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:05 am
i hert my thum doing that once.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:08 am
i _hate_ it when that happens
April 4th, 2008 at 12:10 am
I love cheese, it is amazing…
also, for future reference, *hurt* and *thumb* (sorry, I can’t stand misspellings on simple words)
April 4th, 2008 at 12:11 am
you tipe on cold medacin and see how ell you do kyle
April 4th, 2008 at 12:18 am
It looks more like poor spelling than poor ‘type’-ing induced by cold ‘medicine’. How can you typo ‘medacin’ from ‘medicine’?? ‘ell’ is an understandable typo, though.
Also, PUN TITLE ARGH!
April 4th, 2008 at 12:30 am
Looks liek Caitlin might be a litle nitpicky. This maeks me laff. xD
April 4th, 2008 at 12:31 am
Incidentally, I heart Biff and his fantabulous acts of random Biffery!
April 4th, 2008 at 12:38 am
Biff doesn’t seem to be taking very good care of his hands lately…
April 4th, 2008 at 1:01 am
I did that once, except not to that extent. I lost a fingernail because I wasn’t paying attention to what I was grating… I also peeled a carrot once, and by the time I was done there was almost none left.
@Caitlin I actually like puns… I think they’re funny, but I’m not sure why. because they’re so bad they’re good?
April 4th, 2008 at 1:17 am
Wonder how biff is going to get his hand back.
And…what could biff be watching on TV. ^_^
April 4th, 2008 at 1:24 am
This only strengthens my theory that Biff is made out of some form of clay
April 4th, 2008 at 1:25 am
Simple SEA, he goes back in time to stop himself from grating his hand up. >> we all know he has a time machine
April 4th, 2008 at 1:32 am
This pun is superior in many ways.
April 4th, 2008 at 1:44 am
There has got to be a lot of stuff under that grater….
Biff must not have any bones… I’d imagine they’d be hard to grate with a normal one.
I love grating stuff… assuming the size of the to be grated isn’t larger than the grater. Then it becomes a hassle.
April 4th, 2008 at 3:07 am
weird…is Biff made of dough or something?
April 4th, 2008 at 4:56 am
Biff is made out of ink, we know this because he doesnt activate the motion sensors on elevator doors. Looks like hes gone through alot of BIFF(tm) brand ink to fix himself up this week.
April 4th, 2008 at 6:05 am
I have kind of the same fear, but it extends to reaching into a cup that has uncovered Exacto Blades in it.
April 4th, 2008 at 7:17 am
@Joshua Reese - http://thebookofbiff.com/2007/08/07/306-jar/
April 4th, 2008 at 7:55 am
The implications of this strip are sort of horrifying. Somewhere, some place, there is RESIDUE.
April 4th, 2008 at 8:40 am
Nah, it’s as I’ve suspected for a while. Biff is made of CHEESE.
April 4th, 2008 at 8:58 am
Sera gives Biff a hand.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Man, I’ll tell you though, I still am not a fan of cheese graters. I always end up grating a little bit of my self along with the cheese
Even at 19 years old, I’m afraid of a simple peice of cutlery.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:23 am
“Sera gives Biff a hand.”
Ba-dum-pish. ;
April 4th, 2008 at 9:24 am
Whoa, I lost the second half of my comment. I wonder if that was random, or if it’s a problem with Firefox…
April 4th, 2008 at 9:56 am
I gotta HAND it to you, Sera, that was clever.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:11 am
yeah biff has is brows back
April 4th, 2008 at 10:26 am
OUCH! Although with a lack of bone, blood and fleshy bits on that stump, Biff has been revealed to be made of radish….
April 4th, 2008 at 10:57 am
@speeearr - Hahaha!
April 4th, 2008 at 11:03 am
does this mean biff will get a hook, or better yet a sword
OR…………………………………………………………………
*drum roll*
A CHEESE GRATER!
April 4th, 2008 at 11:09 am
or maybe a permanant puppet or maybe flaming hammers!
Goodness gracious great flaming hammers!
TROGDOR!!!!!
April 4th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
My wife has cut herself so many times on those things… She really just needs to use the food processer we have.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Biff needs a helping hand there with graters.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
Biff apparently bleeds as much as a Jedi.
April 4th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
it’s easy to clean a cheese grater as long as you go in the direction you wouldn’t go to grate cheese.
I like to threaten to kill someone with a cheese grater. it always gets such confused looks…
the horror of the idea is unimaginable
April 4th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Imagine if he had been grating head cheese.
April 4th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
Owwww… I’ve done something like that once. o.- Took off a good chunk of a thumb. Anyway, this is gonna sound random, but I’d love to thank Chris for drawing Biff- I only found him today… (And with the help of Mt. Dew I have seen every comic. Go sugar-rush.)
April 4th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
I always use the bottle brush to wash up the cheese grater- that way my hands are nowhere near it and it doesn’t rip up the clothes or sponges I use to wash up.
I don’t actually use the cheese grater though, as I don’t like cheese- and have no idea what the other four sides of the cheese grater are meant to be used for (Is one for zesting lemons or somthing?)
April 5th, 2008 at 3:49 am
This is why I buy bags pre-grated cheese. My wife bought me a cheese grater that I’ve never used. I’m saving that bad boy for a zombie attack.
April 5th, 2008 at 6:32 am
@ Charlotte:
side1= normal grated cheeese
side2= cheeese slicer (sometimes with a smaller lemon zester)
side3= fine grater
side4= Zester.
Where is his hand?! is it piled up inside the cheeese grater?? or has biff made some sort of teleportational device inside the grater which transfers it directly to another plate somewhere? if he has, i want one. no matter how well i grate cheese, or how sharp the grater is, i always end up covering the table in grated cheese.
@ people who can grate cheese without spillage: i’m jealous!
April 5th, 2008 at 10:10 am
@Dare - Hey, you’re welcome.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
@Taz: Since the comments accept html code, you will lose whatever you type after a “<” character until you type a “>” character. This is the most common reason for losing half of a comment. I get around this by knowing the html codes for the relevant characters. (^_^)
FYI, the code is: ampersand, ell (L), tee (T), semicolon. & L T ;
April 5th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
Cool—I finally went through the whole archive—not to mention the comments.
Cheese graters make me a little nervous, too; there is no reason they should, though, since I generally pay enough attention to prevent grating anything with nerves in it, and it would take quite a bit more spaciness to actually cut myself with the cheese grater.
April 5th, 2008 at 5:03 pm
I see the comic, and the first thing I think of isn’t a grater, but a shredder… And industrial shredder… An industrial, high-security shredder. Named Clyde.
Clyde would eat entire technical manuals, PVC covers, steel piano-hinges, and all, in one go - even manuals that were many hundreds of pages thick. And he’d spit out tiny confetti out the other end - flakes so small they would float in the air. NO ONE was going to reconstruct those documents!
Now… Imagine what would happen if Clyde got a hold of your hand… I suspect it’d look a lot like the image in this cartoon.
April 6th, 2008 at 1:25 am
*looks at finger* My injury hasnt healed all the way yet. I love cheese so even with my fear of cheese graters it is over ruled by the wanting of cheese. ^_^ yay cheese.
April 6th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
I guess Biff doesn’t need anything terribly sophisticated or complex to injure himself. But now I can’t help but wonder where are the “shreadings” of his hand?
@ Chivalrybean: lol!
April 6th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
“I have a cheese-shredder at home, which is its positive name. They don’t call it by its negative name, which is sponge-ruiner. Because I wanted to clean it, but now I have little bits of sponge that would melt easily over tortilla chips.” -Mitch Hedberg
April 6th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
A friend of mine lived in an apartment building with stairs that looked like cheese graters. I was scared to death of those things. I wouldn’t stand on them for too long because I was afraid I would trip and literally grate my knees off or something.