#551 - Magnetron
July 15th, 2008

#551 - Magnetron

When I was a kid I hung out at a friend’s house that had no microwave. His dad wouldn’t allow it. This was frustrating for us because cooking for ourselves was hard and slow. We would always burn stuff. I finally asked his dad what the deal was and he thought they were unsafe. He felt that since you could see into the box the microwaves were obviously coming through and cooking your face. Also when you opened the door the last burst of microwaves would come flying out into the room. This was over 20 years ago… I wonder if he ever gave in and let them get one. I would think the lack of people dying from cooked faces would be apparent by now.

Stumble Biff!

^ 33 Comments...

  1. PsychoDuck

    I’m gonna call it “Misunderstanding Household Electronics Week”. But that’s just my guess.

    The Duck Has Spoken.

  2. 3davideo

    I think it’s appliance week too. And as for the microwaves, they can’t get through the metal mesh due to their long wavelength. They get absorbed by the metal. You can see in because visible light has a wavelength short enough to get through (microwaves: a few meters; visible light: 300-600 nm). As for the “burst”, they travel at the speed of light. It’s impossible. The magnetron shuts off when the contact of the door is undone, and all the microwaves dissipate within nanoseconds—before you can tell that the door has opened.

  3. 3davideo

    Just your daily dose of science.

  4. Fafnir13

    Darnit. Now I’m curious as to what a microwaved photo actually would look like. Melted plastic? Burned and curled up? I need to know!

  5. Chris

    If that puff of air when you opened the microwave was caused by delicious salty buttery microwave popcorn there’s a chance you’ve got lung problems now, doesn’t that suck.

  6. Tvae

    If summertime in the World of Biff (Biffworld?) looks like a microwaved photograph, then I think I’d prefer to visit during the winter.

    At least, that’s if a microwaved photo looks even somewhat like a microwaved CD… A.K.A. pretty, but not healthy.

  7. Caitlin

    It’s 2008 and my mother won’t let us have a microwave. She thinks they fry brains.

  8. Just Ryan

    I enjoyed my old microwave; bought it at a goodwill for 15 bucks, and after a power surge lost the ability to use 3, 6, and 9. Needless to say there was a bit of math to do if I had to cook something that required those numbers. I hate doing math when I’m hungry.

  9. Matthew

    While microwaves are awesome, I tend not to use them, not enough control over the cooking process for my taste.
    Either way, he’s probably the same crazy that won’t use a mobile phone.

  10. trevor

    Chris, wherever you work now, I hope it really utilizes your creativity.

  11. SEA

    How about autumn or spring? o_o
    heh. XD

  12. MaskedMan

    At Radar School, for the Nav, one of the search radars we were studying could cook birds in mid-flight, if they flew too close to the emitter horn.

    I figure that’ll do your popcorn in about 1.2 microseconds. Efficiency!

  13. Chris

    @trevor - What a nice thing to say.

  14. speearr

    *smacks head* but of course!
    oh, the logic….

  15. Fop

    my fiancee still thinks that…about microwaves, I mean. Won’t have one in the house. I just had to heat up my leftover pancakes in the oven. Try though I might to convince her that my family got a microwave some time before I started kindergarten, and 22 years of microwave use has not yet managed to kill me, I still have to cook microwave pizzas in the oven….I feel this defeats the purpose.

  16. Chris

    Interesting, I thought my friend’s dad was unique in his paranoia since I never encountered it again.

  17. Jackson

    Normally I’d say this was a bad idea, but given the general operation of Biff’s universe, his plan here really could go either way.

  18. steve-o

    One line of weird al’s “I’ll sue ya!” comes to mind; “I sued Panasonic, they never said I shouldn’t use their microwave to dry off my cat!

  19. Knight Blazer

    Hey Chris, did your friend’s dad also believe that everything was one big government conspiracy? No offence, but he sounds like the type that wears tinfoil hats to keep from being mind controlled.

  20. Felix

    What a way to go.

  21. Chris

    @Knight Blazer - Nope, he just thought that he could open a microwave oven door faster than the speed of light. Apart from that, he was fairly normal.

  22. The Great Joe Bivins

    I opened a microwave door faster than the speed of light once and my hand melted off. Luckily I was still within fifteen hours of my last regeneration so it grew back.

  23. no name

    Yep, I think it’s Electrical Appliance Week.

  24. no name

    @ Chris (not Chris Hallbeck, The other Chris) - That’s only if you eat microwaved popcorn just about every day for breafast, lunch, and dinner.

  25. Cpt.Ziggy

    Well I would go into detail about how that was not possible but it would seem I wasn’t fast enough,bummer.

  26. Wizard

    Well, SOME people probably shouldn’t have microwaves. Like the guy at work recently who tried to reheat a fast-food burger. Seems he put the whole bag into the microwave. With the burger still inside the wrapper. The FOIL wrapper. The arcing from the foil set the bag on fire. Just another fun day at work…

  27. Libraman

    Love the comic, love the comments, and love the story. Seriously, you couldn’t get any better….. Oh wait, in Biff’s world, he could do better than perfect without having whole universe collapse on one another O.O
    Good job!

  28. Rampage

    That summer photo would scare me.

    Well, if it actually looked like that in the summer, that would be cool.
    But scary.. o.O

  29. HayleyJ

    Yeah, In my high school they HAD a microwave that we could use if we brought heat up meals and stuff, anyways, some of the kids thought it would be funny if as lunch was ending to put someone’s gym shoe wrapped in foil in for 99 minutes, the lunch room caught fire and we were sent home early, stupidity worked in our favor for once

  30. Gato

    My mom’s family were the first ones to get a Microwave. Apparantly the neighbor kids came over and they all watched it cook a hot dog.

  31. Halo Chief

    Why can’t that work in real life?!?

  32. Ben the Nomad

    Actually, your mates dad was almost right about the microwaves.
    Atleast for the microwaves of 20yrs ago.
    My dad used to work a elecs company that produced them, and he has some interesting/scary stories.
    They are alot safer now, but I still prefer the taste of food cooked the real way.

  33. Amake

    There was a guy who rigged his microwave to run with the door removed; he died.

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