August 21st, 2008
#573 - Lift
There were two levels of monster fear. The standard under the bed monster was always threatening to grab your ankles if you needed to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. The scarier ones were going to get you if you had even one pinky exposed outside of the covers. This was of course always in summer when under the covers meant having to endure the stifling sauna that your own breath was creating.
August 21st, 2008 at 12:02 am
Crap, I want hover socks now. So many advances made recently in the realm of sock technology…
Also, I take it this is childhood misconception week, then?
The Duck Has Spoken.
August 21st, 2008 at 12:05 am
So what would happen if he wore these inside his Saturn-gravity boots?
August 21st, 2008 at 12:16 am
Torg, you beat me to it. >.<
August 21st, 2008 at 12:22 am
@Nathan:
August 21st, 2008 at 12:26 am
Never mind the Saturn Gravity Boots - I wanna know what went wrong with the hover-socks. From the looks of things, they look more like “launch-you-into-orbit-socks.” If not for the ceiling, Biff would be describing a semi-balistic trajectory for near-space! do “hover socks” come with level adjustments, or did Biff just get the wrong size?
August 21st, 2008 at 12:57 am
Kinda reminds me of the iron man movie, when he was testing out the flight capabilities.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:19 am
@sea
@ Chris
Yeah, I remember those days.
I saw this show about alien abductions when I was 7 (During June, of course), and for a week I completely covered myself, and I did it every now and then for months.
Not Fun.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:23 am
What I used to do as a kid was having a fictive defense mechanism on which I added different parts to take care of any monster that might attack me during my sleep.
Guess I had quite the imagination.
August 21st, 2008 at 3:33 am
This one reminded me of Zelda.
August 21st, 2008 at 3:54 am
kid icarus, socks with wings, lol.
August 21st, 2008 at 3:59 am
I want his pyjama pants…
August 21st, 2008 at 5:27 am
I just finished reading through the archives, and I must say: this comic is pure win!
August 21st, 2008 at 7:40 am
Thanks RG!
August 21st, 2008 at 7:42 am
When I was a kid, I was less concerned about what lurked under the bed, and more about the shadows. My room’s window faced the street, and every passing car would cast horrific shadows that swept the room like the criss-crossed searchlight of a hungry devil, searching for someone to devour. I knew the true source of the shadows, but their effect still harrowed me with irrational childhood dread.
On another note, hover socks are an awesome idea and I hope we will see more of them.
August 21st, 2008 at 8:03 am
Man, I still get that fear about monsters-grabbing-exposed-foot thing. I once had a dream that someone stood at the foot of my bed and grabbed my feet, so I switched positions and slept with my head at the foot of my bed for about six months. I have no idea why I thought someone grabbing my head was better than someone grabbing my foot.
August 21st, 2008 at 8:32 am
Oh yes, the blanket oven. I remember it well.
Worst. Thing. Ever.
August 21st, 2008 at 8:35 am
Did anybody have their parents sing them a song about monsters under the bed? Or were my parents just trying to scare me.
Lyrics:
Chorus: “There is something alive living underneath my bed/ I know it’s trying to eat me,/ And if I even dangle my toes at the edge/ I’d be gone completely.
I know it’s down there somewhere/ with some socks and a pair of dirty underwear/ a sandwich my mommy made when I was sick, / and a balloon with a little bit of air in it.
There is something alive living underneath my bed/ I know it’s trying to eat me,/ And if I even dangle my toes at the edge/ I’d be gone completely/ I’d be gone completely/ I’d be gone completely/ I’d be gone…”
And she’d get softer and softer at the last part. Occasionally, she’d grab my leg and scream as she finished, and it scared the living daylights out of me.
August 21st, 2008 at 9:17 am
My monsters were less under the bed and more hiding in my computer.
August 21st, 2008 at 9:33 am
biff is awesome! good work!
laugh if you want.. but my summer of blanket oven was after I saw thriller for the first time… (nightmare on elm street was next)
oh.. and when you turn the lights off in the basement and still have to go up the stairs. something will get you.
August 21st, 2008 at 10:53 am
I’d try writing some long description of a really scary monsters just to freak evreyone out, but nothing coming to me.
August 21st, 2008 at 11:01 am
@trevor;
You want really brief descriptions, not long ones - The most horrible monsters come from our imaginations, with *just* enough description to help the ol’ imagination along.
August 21st, 2008 at 11:04 am
Whoo Hoo! Flower pajamas!
I was never afraid of monsters under my bed. only in my closet.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:08 pm
heh at least you didn’t have a closet that the foot of the bed faced then have some long forgotten toys cast two lights that looked like eyes through the clothes I would yell and parents would come in and they would turn on the light making the light disappear that was the worst I was five and those batteries where very good they lasted a month I think it was killer clowns from outerspace that scared me then after that we watched It so yea laugh all you want I’ll laugh with you now
August 21st, 2008 at 1:15 pm
@MindOverMattr, that’s kinda fsked up…
@Christ, but that’s kinda fsking awesme.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:54 pm
Good comic, haha
I’d share a monster story, but honestly I never
believed in them…like, at all…I am so weird…
August 21st, 2008 at 3:37 pm
I was never scared of monsters when I was a kid,just ghosts,and my mom
August 21st, 2008 at 4:02 pm
what would happen if they shorted out? I mean theyve got frikin wires stickin out!
August 21st, 2008 at 4:04 pm
I enjoy seeing Biff in pain.
August 21st, 2008 at 6:08 pm
Perhaps Biff jumped on his bed in hover socks?
August 21st, 2008 at 6:25 pm
Micah, I believe there is many who enjoy it too, me being another.
August 21st, 2008 at 6:42 pm
As I do.
August 21st, 2008 at 9:51 pm
I hope Biff doesn’t have a monster in the attic to worry about!
And MindoverMattR, I kind of had the same song sung to me too… thanks for reminding me it! XD
August 21st, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Cute jammies…
August 21st, 2008 at 11:15 pm
I just noticed that I accidently wrote “Christ” instead of “Chris” O_O
August 21st, 2008 at 11:45 pm
A legitimate mistake.
August 22nd, 2008 at 9:43 am
Love this one. Had a wooden sword that my dad made me when i was growing up, of course it “killed” the monsters. Also worked pretty well on my older brother when he tried to scare me too.
MindoverMattr
look up Voltaire’s song “Goodnight Demonslayer” for the best lullaby ever.